Redeeming time

Wisdom to know the difference

One of the prayers I remind myself of quite often is the Serenity Prayer we all know so well:

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

We all have things that come along in our lives that we cannot change. How often do we end up stuck trying to resolve things we cannot resolve. I wrote about unresolved pain over a month ago, how we need to find our way to rest in God's love and mercy when we can't resolve painful issues or events in our lives.

Yet there are many times when we are called to action. Times where we should not shut our eyes or look away from pain and evil but to confront it. We are called to light and salt in this world, light that exposes darkness, salt that may sting yet prevents the world around us from rotting further.

How often do we lack courage to step in where injustice is being done, hide our light when it should shine high, aren't willing to step into the rot to stop it's spread? What saddens me is that often we don't even take action in our own homes, in our families, or in our church. We watch as our brothers and sisters in veil of darkness commit rotten deeds. And as they spread this rot, they hurt many, and more than anyone else they hurt themselves.

So how are we to act when our brother does wrong? Should we just quietly pray and hope he changes his way? Of course this needs to be done, but is there something more God calls us to do? Can our actions change anything for the better or even prevent things from getting worse? Quite often there is the need to expose darkness with light, and to stop the rotting with salt.

Scripture instructs us to correct others, individually, with a witness and as a group. God in His wonderful grace doesn't want any to perish, yet there comes a time where deeds of darkness need be exposed and the rot removed before they do more harm.

And all this calls for devine wisdom to know the difference....

"people, People, PEOPLE!"

As i talked on Skype with a friend, I noticed he had put this expession "people, People PEOPLE!" on his comment line. Didn't ask him about it, but it triggered some thoughts in my mind, in no less than three directions.

My first thought was just expressing his frustration with the way people think and act. Well, there's alot I could say here. People I have trusted have abused my trust. People who were supposed to be credible and of "high regard" have lied and decieved for their own profit. Other people I call friends have allowed their standards and ethics to be compromised under pressure.

Next my thoughts were about people themselves, individuals who in God's eyes are more valuable than anything else on this planet. God loves each person, and asks us to love our neighbours as ourselves. Spending time with people and helping them should be one of our highest priorities...

Finally I thought of all the people who have robbed me of time and energy. There are quite a number, and just like everyone else I have limited time. Scripture tells us we can "buy time". How do we do this? And what do we "buy time" for?

Over the weekend I was asked to draw a personal network map of people I communicate with on a regular basis. And as I started listing people, I was reminded of more people and then more and more People! Over 70 individuals i've been in relatively intense contact with within the past year, regarding personal, family or business issues! That's a lot of relationships to manage!

So how are these relationships, and how have they grown? I have to admit, with the exception of a handful they have all become superficial over time. Even relationships that were once heart to heart friendships have now become mere aquaintances. Yet these people are important to me...

We (especially men) have limited capacity of how many people we can relate to at one time in our lives. We struggle between developing relationships and the real danger of overloading our lives with too many friendships to manage, which just consume our energy and time.

So I've decided to buy some time. Time for myself, time to rest and not be consumed, to stand still, not run the rat race, time to reflect and map out the next steps. People are an important part of my life, yet i cannot allow myself to be consumed by too many relationships.

As important as these people may be, I need not fit into all their lives, I just need to fit into mine.