our theory of attraction..

Last night I started thinking about the strange things we do to attract others. We make attempts to win the other's approval by our elequant words or gracious acts. But are our actions truly gracious or are they under a gracious veil self serving?

We tend to believe certain type of behaviour is nescessary to woo or secure another person's affection for us. These are often based on expectations reflected from our homes, churches and society. We expect to receive in exchange for our giving, to be loved for our words, and accepted for our good deeds. Is it any wonder we get so messed up in our relationships when we start to barter for love and acceptance...

So, do actions lead to love or does love lead to actions?

I believe both are quite possible, however love that grows out of actions tends to remain somewhat conditional. In other words "as long as you do this, i will love you". Isn't this the model society portrays, that love is dependant on words, actions, looks, status, wealth... If it's so, wouldn't our quest for love and acceptance become more of a performance? What would happen when we tire or become incapable of performing? Would we still be loved for who we are, or loved for only what we do?

This performance mentality is often translated to our relationship with God. We worship, praise, perform good deeds to please Him. We have been taught and conditioned to do this, it's something we believe is acceptable to God. With all the 'sweet-talking' and actions, are we really trying to attract God? What exactly is our purpose in attracting Him? Do we think flattery will bring us closer to God, help gain His favour, acceptance or love?

What then is the basis for true love? Are there conditions of performance attached to love or is true love unconditional? Imagine if God already loved us just as we are, without the need for our elequant words or good deeds. And if His love were unconditional with no strings attached, maybe we wouldn't need to put on a performance to attract or please Him.

God's love is true. It led to actions, giving all He had, His life, absolutely unconditionally. Just think about it for a moment,.. perhaps He's the one who's trying to attract us...